Check It Out

I feel a change a comin'
I don't know what it is
But bring it on cuz life goes on
Take a bow
Actions cause reactions
That's just the way it is
So make a move - turn things around
Check it out now

Change is good
Knock on wood
You shouldn't or you should
Make a move now check it out now
You can decide
Which way you ride
Change - sometimes life's a race
Better pick up the pace
Take it up a notch watch take it up a notch and embrace
Kick it up to a higher place

Check it out now - check it out now - check it out
Check it out now - check it out now - check it out
Now now check it out now check it out now
Now now check it out now check it check it check it out!

These things happen
Just move on

Take a little look - take a little look
Take a little look from the other side
Take a little time - take a little time
Then make a move cuz you can't go wrong
Take charge
Time to take the bull by the horns - by the balls
Stand up and deal with it,
Shit happens - get real with it, soon enough it'll all be gone

Check it out now - check it out now - check it out
Check it out now - check it out now - check it out
Now now check it out now check it out now
Now now check it out now check it check it check it out!

No use freakin
Life goes on

Oh a sailin' we go
A live a live oh
Whe'er the wind blows
Where the wind blows

Check it out now - check it out now - check it out
Check it out now - check it out now - check it out
Now now check it out now check it out now
Now now check it out now check it check it check it out!

Things stop changing
When we're dead

Cotton Eye Joe

I met a girl one fall
I fell in love and I couldn't get up
She stood above me all a glow
I ran toward her - You know I scored her
But now I'm here with Cotton Eye Joe

I met this boy one winter
I kissed him and then followed through
Without the aid of mistletoe
A staff party - holiday time
But now he's gone: Cotton Eye Joe

Cotton Eye Joe I gotta know
Que Sara or quid pro quo?
How I'm a wishin you'd never show
Cotton Eye Joe - Cotton Eye Joe

I met this girl one spring
We hooked up at a retro party
I'd always been pro bono
But making love to Sonny and Cher was better than Yoko Ono-no-no
All the same I knew this game
Was either whoa or wow
I went from whoa - wooed her and wowed her and now - Cotton Eye Joe

Cotton Eye Joe Cotton Eye Joe
They say you reap just what you sow
I say goodbye - you say hello
Cotton Eye Joe Cotton Eye Joe

I met this boy one summer
It was love at first whistle - it happened so fast
Oh, but you know the drill - it didn't last
Not that he'd ever tell me so I'd never know
That he won't call me back cuz of Cotton Eye Joe

Cotton Eye Joe Cotton Eye Joe
I could be Vincent Van Gogh
Give up an ear if you'd never show
Just say no to Cotton Joe

Cotton Eye Joe Cotton Eye Joe
They say you reap just what you sow
I say goodbye - you say hello
Cotton Eye Joe Cotton Eye Joe
Cotton Eye Joe Cotton Eye Joe

Happening Thing

Now if you gotta test the water
Hell dive right in
Just think of the adventure
Invite all of your friends, we'll have a dangerous party

Well up on the rooftop the view from the chimney
Resembles a city in spite of us all
A cynical man behind a large pair of Cool Rays
Exposes a smirk and then proposes a toast

This is a Happening Thing
I've had enough of a Happening Thing
What a casual fling
This is a Happening Thing
Can't keep awake if you know what I mean
What a waste of a dream

So don't you talk about the weather
If you're grafted to your leathers
It's gonna rain a little later
40 days, 40 nights, all sold out

The parallel's a cliche a line from a movie
'Bout the deluge, the savior who washes our trespasses
As the flood carries the dregs of the people
Entitled and simple and everyone thinks

This is a Happening Thing
Can't keep awake if you know what I mean
What a waste of a dream
This is a Happening Thing
It's the biz - it's a Coke - it's a kiss
And that's the way that it is.

It's a Happening Thing
Can only happen if you're ready to swing
To a perfect extinction
The Happening Thing
I've had enough of a Happening Thing
What a casual fling
This is a Happening Thing
Can't keep awake if you know what I mean
What a waste of a dream
This is a Happening Thing
Take the piss - it's a Coke - it's a kiss
And that's the way that it is

4 is 4

This is not my beautiful what?!?
Are you ready?
Bonzai!

I wanna dance like a ballerina
Tights so tights it's a little obscene
Hip hop, cha cha cha, tango, ballet
My body tells you what I gotta say
Funk the funk
Why you wanna watch?
Get down
Take it up a notch!
Point shoe, doc boot, chuck or stiletto
Everybody feel it - everybody
Let's go!

Sure

Sure

Sure

Ten four good buddy!

Four is four - ten is ten
Forty isn't fourteen
Fourteen also isn't forty
So don't you say forty is fourteen

Bonzai - hi it's me!
Bonzai - it's a little tree!
Bonzai - what a trip!
Bonzai - let 'er rip!

Dancing from Chicago to Sarajevo
Hop nob - heel and toe, silver fox - afro
Makes no never mind it's always good to go
Ready for a big show: Bring it on, Maestro!

Sock it!
Four is four. Ten is ten.
Forty isn't fourteen.
Fourteen also isn't forty.
So don't you say forty is fourteen!

Bonzai - Take it south
Bonzai - Let's put on a show
Bonzai - We can fiddle around
Bonzai - Let's do-si-do now here we go

Let's do-si-do, now here we go - comon' let's go to and fro!

I wanna dance to a rockin' little fiddle
Gonna bend from the knees give a twist in the middle
With bips and beeps making music like a cell phone
Wanna get down to the sound of an Ace Tone

Trap Shy

"Oh us old foxes are trap shy, especially when the bait goes to chasin' us"

Jed's right - you gotta be suspicious.
You just gotta!

Trap Shy! Trap Shy!

Why must I, be the guy, the guy who gets chased around, all over town, looked up and down
I own a mirror I know that it's not that I'm Johnny Depp, but what the heck

I still know a trap when I see one
I might be well groomed but won't be one
If I wed the weddings a shot gun

Now when I say shotgun, I mean I got no choice - if my ladies got a baby comin' I suppose I should rejoice - take it as a sign - sign my life on the dotted line - cross my fingers and hope it'll all work out fine

But let's just hope that never happens...

I'm a big fish not a small fry
I'm wise but no wise guy
When I'm thinkin mom and apple pie
I get trap shy
When I see a pair of thigh highs
You bound to hear a little "oh my"
But if it's followed by a wink of an eye
I get trap shy
Bonsai! I hear a battle cry
Moving target - I'm a bullseye
No test drive, cuz I don't wanna buy
I'm trap shy
Still, it's not like I'm given'em the evil eye
I'm not saying the girl is evil…I'm just concerned she might be greedy!

Why must I, be the guy, the guy who gets chased around, all over town, looked up and down
I own a mirror I know it's not that I'm Johnny Depp, but what the heck

It don't seem too natural for a bird to chase a bee
And this clever fox is trap shy when the bait starts chasin' me!
Not like I'm givin' 'em the evil eye
It more of a sigh then a hue and cry - I mean
A gold diggers better than a drive by
But it comes with a knot that I won't tie
No bowtie, or black tie
I won't settle down and I won't lie
I like it on the fence - I'm on stand by
Do you take this woman?
No - bye bye!

I'm trap shy

Well, I Mean, It's Like, You Know

Well, I mean, it's like, you know

Your lookin' fine and I wanna get to know you
There's a new star in my show
Butterflies, tickling me on cue
Cupid nailed me with his dart 'n' bow
You could be an angel from heaven
Can't tell from the club we're in
The lights are low and the music's at eleven
We find a corner - have a chat - but then -

She opens her mouth. Nothing comes out.
She's put some words together - such a cutie
She's not saying anything but she's not arguing
All is forgiven - Booty!

Well, I mean, it's like, you know

I see you ballin' in the field, gonna steal my heart
Like you stole third base last Saturday
I know you ain't a doctor - lawyer - thinkin' Tom Sawyer's just a song, never heard of Twain anyway
You're not well-read, so-so in bed but what the heck I like the way you look on my arm
You do the jock-talk-beef-cake-walk-around-the block, lookin' hot like a stud right off the farm!

Perhaps she's found her Romeo
Perhaps there's no one greater
But he's much more fun in a marathon
Than stuck in an elevator
He too can put words together, in a meaningless combination
and thus two lovers pass it on to the next generation

Well, I mean, it's like, you know

Well, that's it
I mean, I'm done
It's like, I'm finished
You know, I'm wrong - cuz I keep talking to play this thing out - while future generations keep freaking me out!

Well I mean, it's like, you know

What If

What if? What?
What if? Oh...

I'm Marshall of this Love Parade
Sound the drums and blow the horns
If love is like a red red rose
Sniff the buds / mind the thorns
The Garden of Eden needs some seedin
Let's get growing
Life is but a dream, keep rowing

What if you could have a separate tap just for vodka?
What if eggs could be cloned without the hen?
What if your cell phone came with a breathalyzer that prevented you from calling your ex at 4am?
What if cats were bigger than dogs?
What if nobody hears this song?
What if the flu is good for you?
What happens if everything we know is wrong?

What if?

I'm host of my life's game show
Can be a contestant but I know
I'm the guy with the questions...
No answers, but a few suggestions
How about we assume we don't know it all?
How about we keep our big heads open?
What if - is a game worth playin
What if - I'm just sayin...

What if I had wings that could make me fly oh fly
What if there's a ball and a chain to make me stay

What if?

I'm Already There

Come with me
And baby we will take a ride
There's nowhere left to hide
So let's be on our way

Did you ever wonder what's in store?
There is so much to choose
Between assassin and the booze
We shouldn't feel a thing

I'm already there
I'm already there because it's here within me

We sail along through empty seas
And as we go do as we please
We love, we sleep, to dream, to wake
To hope to hell that it was no, no, no mistake
It seems to me to be unfair
That you are here and we are there

iQuote

Everything's been said before
Cliche: Je t'adore!
I like to jot down little notes
I quote quotes - and I quote:

"The world owes you nothing it was here first"
MARK TWAIN

""When you reach the top, that's when the climb begins"
MICHAEL CAINE

"No man is useless, so long as he's got a friend"
WALTER BRENNAN

"Sometimes history needs a push"
LENIN

Everything's been said before
Cliche: Je t'adore!
I like to jot down little notes
I quote quotes - and I quote:

"Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days"
BEN FRANKLIN

"If you can't stand the heat, don't go to Cancun in the summer"
BEN STEIN

"The secret of creativity is knowing how to hide your sources"
EINSTEIN

"You think you're a man but you're just a boy"
DIVINE

Quoting Quotes is not taboo
If you give credit where the credit it due
Plagiarism gets my goat
But I don't steal - I quote quotes

Why rely on something new?
When there is something tried and true?
Others words - your throat
Add them up and quote a quote

Everything's been said before
Cliche: Je T'adore!
I like to jot down little notes
I quote quotes - and I quote

Everthing's been done before
Dejavu - Encore!
I like to jot down little notes
I quote quotes - and I quote

Everything's been said before
Cliche: Je T'adore!
Everything's been said before
Cliche: Je T'adore!
Everything's been said before
Cliche: Je T'adore!
I like to jot down little notes
I quote quotes - and I quote:

And I quote

Sorry, I Was Just Horny

Life was so fun before I slept with your mother
Dated your sister, messed around with your brother
There was a time we could relate to each other
All in the family

I'd love to come and visit - stay over, over night
There's your ass - I'll kiss it
You're looking awful lonely - why the long, long face?
I need someone to hold me

I'm sorry. I was just horny.

Lost you at a rave and was really ravin'
Didn't mean to be so misbehavin'
But I had an itch and I had a cravin'
Skipping through the fields through a maze of flowers
You were on a hill for hours and hours
Sunshine - rainy day - golden showers

I'm not playing games and I am not ashamed.
I just really liked, what's his name?
You said your boss is a jerk - but I jerked him off at work
"Reciprocation" - key word!

I'm sorry. I was just horny.

You may find your dreams come true when you free your mind.
Come and go as you may please - freeway your behind!

Wanted advice from a radio announcer
Wasn't as hot as the couples councilor
I had 'em both and a great big bouncer
Closet skeletons peepin' in the peephole
We talked about the old church and steeple
But maybe we should see some other people

My guru - ecstatic
Yoga - elastic
The coach - fantastic!
We can stay friends
It doesn't have to end
I'm Barbie - You're Ken!

I'm sorry. I was just horny.

Awkward

Awkward - it's awkward
Too often awkward - really awkward

Awkward - some moments, awkward
Too often awkward - key word is "awkward"

When you go to the gym and find out - you're not well hung
Awkward - That's awkward

When you granny kisses you - and slips you the tongue
Awkward - That's sometimes awkward

Awkward - the word sounds awkward
Forward or backward you got some awkward

Drawkwa - that's just backwards
It's awkward backwards - but it sounds awkward

When you whistle at a girl - but turns out to be a man
Awwwwwwkwaaarrrd

When you call your date Marsha but her name is Jan
Awkward - Brady Bunch awkward

One stupid word
Got a little bit blurred
But don't be deterred
To what has occurred
So haven't you heard?
The onus is transferred
Just like a big turd
Isn't it awkward?

Awkward - it's awkward
Awkward - really awkward

Awkward - some moments awkward
Too often awkward - key word is "awkward"

Drawkwa - that's just backwards
It's awkward backwards - but it sounds awkward

Awkward - the word sounds awkward
Awkward it's awkward it's awkward it's awkward
Isn't it awkward?

Joe

Joe...
We all know Joe - Joe Blow
Not John Doe - you know, Joe
Wherever you travel
Wherever you go
You'll find Joe

Just an average Joe
Not rich with dough
Not a G.I.Joe or a mean Mo Fo
Just Joe - that's Joe

Joe is a nice guy - helps you with your groceries
Joe is a bit shy - but never makes you ill at ease
Joe lives down the street - not quite sure which house is his
Joe is a working Joe - but I don't know what his business is
Oh Yo Joe

Mystery Joe
He's a nice man
Curious Joe
What is he doing?
Neighbour Joe
Joe smiles all day
But he has nothing to say...

Joe gets a bum rap
Killer Joe and all that
Cup of Joe ain't all that bad but
Joe Schmoe? How sad!

Joe is so misunderstood
Joe Cool is a smokin camel
Joe Cool's a beagle alter ego
Our Joe ain't that kind of mammal

I betcha Joe works 9 to 5, overnight or not at all
I bet Joe has crooked teeth, an overbite or lost them all
Joe eats frozen dinners, shops at Winners lives with mom
Or dines on pasta, lives with a Rasta, smokin' ganja all night long

Oh Yo Joe

Robots Are Cool

Man made machine. And it was good.
Now robots are here, for good.

I got a beanie and I wanna eat beans
Can't sing but I got a machine
Pull a little cheater if you know what I mean
I'm the me that makes me me
They say when you write - You should write what you know
I know what I like - so - here I go - I mean, here we go
Uber alles!

Robots are cool!

Robots can be friendly and will do my bidding
What are you doing David?
I'm just kidding!

Robby brought it on - 99 Necron
Tik-Tok, Go-bots, Fembots, Mechani Kong
R2D2, Hal and Cylons, Brainiac, Voltron
Yeah I could go on and on

Data and Optimus Prime
They deserve recognition
And Sonny and Bishop
They are also robots on a mission

You can call me Gort,
Or you can call me Gnut
But don't you call me Sentinel - Sentinels suck
I can't think of a robot uglier or meaner
Like an angry octopus mixed up with an unhinged vacuum cleaner

Robots are cool!

Noo-Noo? Yes! Fender Bender? Please!
Dot Matrix and here comes Thundercleese
We're going deep if you know what I mean
Bring on Huey - Duey and Louie - activate!

Yes!
No!
Yeah - Uh huh.
No - uh uh.

Unless We Success

Yes We Success
Unless We Success
Unless We Success
We Success We Success
Unless

Scratching of the head
Signing of the cross
Bending of the brain
Mental of the floss
We make no bones
We feel no stress
We cannot fail
Unless we success

Yes We Success
Unless We Success
Unless We Success
We Success We Success
Unless

We do our worst on purpose
We shall not do our best
Irittainment shall prevail
Unless we success
Electric is eclectic
We love it we confess - I love it!
We cannot lose
Unless We Success